Friday, February 1, 2008

the rules of the road

I'm in Hampi right now, a gorgeous, gorgeous area of india. it's basically a rock landscape -- millions of boulders stacked on top of each other, for miles all around, with rice paddies and the occasional rock temple thrown in for fun. everything is pretty far apart and there's no public transportation, so I decided to finally sack up and learn how to ride a motorbike. it's actually pretty easy, though riding in india is a different ballpark so I've come up with this set of rules for my future reference:

1) when encountering rickshaws or other bikes, just move left. when encountering trucks, tractors, or buses, get off the road if you want to live
2) front braking on gravel or sandy bits = not a good idea, unless you want a souvenir scar from india all over your face
3) little kids who run up to you and yell 'hi' and stick their hands into the road are cute, so slow down. but don't stop, otherwise they'll surround you and poke your arms and try to practice their english with you, and it takes a while to escape.
4) if a local sidles up to you on his scooter while you're driving and tries to initiate sketchy conversation, feel free to yell "fuck off, can't you see I'm driving?"
5) try to carry a spare water bottle of gasoline in your rucksack. that's right, a water bottle.
6) there is no need to honk at goats because they always stay to the side. chickens, birds, pigs and normal dogs will move when you honk, but honking will only piss off crazy dogs and make them run after you. cows won't listen to anything. especially the ones I saw that were too busy being intimate in the middle of the road.

1 comment:

corazon francisco said...

funny rules to remember!

love you, mom